What Santa Taught Me This Year

Every year my parents instruct us to write a note to Santa to put with the milk and cookies. This year I was the only child who conceded, but only because I had the ulterior motive of pointing the finger of blame at a certain jolly old man. I wrote a letter to him asking questions … Continue reading What Santa Taught Me This Year

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What We Need

(Obviously many of you are spending December in different ways. I wish I could be more politically correct with this blog, but I've celebrated Christmas my entire life, and I can only write about what I know. I'm sorry.) I feel a constant pressure to be better. It's partly my mental illnesses and partly my environment. Wanting to be … Continue reading What We Need

Poetry Friday: Enough

Enough   I will shake with sobs on the couch in the office, cover my face and wish it were over.   I will build a pyramid of used tissues in my lap as my tears stream; slowly working through the questions, and, even harder, the answers.   I will leave thinking I am through—too … Continue reading Poetry Friday: Enough

Why I Am Maney

I started this blog one year ago on the sixteenth. Some of you may have wondered why this blog is called "maney smiles back." Happy one year anniversary, folks. Here's the story: (Quick background: my siblings have called me Maney for years. I think it started in teasing: "Mane-again is a pain-again;" or maybe that stemmed from the nickname. … Continue reading Why I Am Maney

Pride

My counselor recently grilled me on how I need to be proud of myself and my life. She tried to get me to own up to all these supposedly good things about me, but it was so hard. This round, my depression has made me feel worthless. And since I just realized that that is a problem, I've … Continue reading Pride