I didn’t mean to fall in love with him, but I did. Things like that happen, I suppose, in this journey of life. Casualties of the heart, perhaps. Have you ever fallen in love with someone who doesn’t love you back? I tell myself it’s good for me. I tell myself this will help me help others later on in my life; to understand, to empathize. I ignore the pain and I move on. This is one of my acquired gifts. But surely, you don’t think this is going to be the main subject of this post?
There’s a song by The Paper Kites that I’ve gotten into recently. It’s called “Featherstone,” and not only is the music beautiful and uplifting, but the lyrics are just so choice. In particular, I love these words:
And my love is yours but your love’s not mine
So I’ll go but we know I’ll see you down the line
And we’ll hate what we’ve lost but we’ll love what we find
And I’m feeling fine, we’ve made it to the coastline
Basically, I feel like this person is saying, “I love you and you don’t love me back, but, hey, our paths will cross again someday. This moment hurts and we won’t enjoy it, but what’s coming is so much better we’ll forget we ever felt this sadness. I feel okay because we’re at the edge of a new horizon.”
It hints at a beautiful future, and I, Maney, girl of depression and anxiety, dig it. When life is so full of confusion and pain–when you can’t see light at either end of the tunnel, and you don’t know which way to go–I love to believe that whichever way we pick, eventually we will find happiness, fulfillment; even joy.
So, my dear Reader, I hope you saunter forth. Believe me when I say I know how hard it is to do anything some days, let alone take life in your hands and keep moving forward. But from one average human to another, I truly hope you do. And even when you fail and it’s too hard to go on, if nothing else–if you don’t believe in a loving, comforting God or an all-knowing, all-loving Savior to help you forward–maybe it will help to know that a certain Maney is trying most days, failing others, but all around not giving up. And if I can do it, so can you.
“Featherstone” by The Paper Kites.